Michael Willey 2

I could not help noticing how many people have the same problem as me (including my age). I needed single vision specs for long distance for many years. Gradually my eyes deteriorated to the point where I could not longer read with my distance specs as my arms were not long enough. For work I was required to go on a couple of day release courses per year. I found the solution to my problem was to use old specs when I attended courses. I was a bit fuzzy at distance but I could read and write OK. Then I went on a day release course in a large hotel in Manchester. At lunchtime I went out for the rather splendid meal they serve up in these hotels. I sat next to some guy and said to him, "Where have you come from?" He replied, "Bristol". I said, "I'm sure you could have got a course closer to home than Manchester". He said, "I was giving the lecture". For a moment I thought of giving him the explanation about the glasses. But I didn't bother. He probably thought 'they are not a very attentive bunch here'. That was when I started with varifocals. I got the first pair from a small optician and later went to Vision Express. I noticed there was a difference especially when I looked down at my feet. There are certainly different grades of varifocals. The better ones are more expensive. It is worth persisting for the benefit in the long run.

Spotted in the 'Lonely Hearts' column of the 'The Kerryman' - Batchelor aged 50 with own farm looking for woman between 25 and 45 with a view to matrimony. Also for sale one fat pig suitable for home curing.

It has been a lot of fun. Happy Christmas and a better New Year to all.

Very nice

Two old women in church. One turns to the other and says, "I've just let out a big silent fart, what should I do?" The other replied, "Get a new battery for your hearing aid". When I lived in Tralee I saw a man stood outside the pub door smoking a cigarette. A guard came up to him and said, "You're not two meters from the door". He replied, "I'm in that pub over the road". A friend of ours was working as a painter and decorator in a doctor's house. The doctor said to him, "I see you cover your mistakes with putty". He replied, "At least I don't use a shovel"

vot is a vot-meter

... and then I won another flight box - which was nice!

moi aussi

Moi aussi

In for a penny in for a magnifying glass

mmmm Nice

It could be me. Or you.

Why not

I was driving along when I heard a siren behind me. I thought I hope its just an ambulance but it was a police car. The officer said, "I'll have to give you a ticket". I said, "Do I get a prize?" He said, "Three of these and you get a bicycle". Then he said, "What's in your boot?" I said, "Me foot". An Irishman met his fairy godmother. She said, "Now that you have met me I will grant you 3 wishes. What do you want for your first wish?" He said, "I want a bottle of Guiness that never runs out". The fairy godmother waved her wand an there was a bottle of Guiness. He took the bottle and poured it into a glass and immediately it filled up again. Then the fairy godmother said, "What do you want for your other 2 wishes?" "That's easy", he said, "I'll have another 2 of these"