Sign of the times - funnies * Remember this is a family friendly forum and inappropriate postings will be removed without warning.

[ken anderson.]

the makers of pedigree chum dog food have gone bust!!!

 

 

the've had to call in the retrievers.

 

 mark's and spencers are going to merge with poundstretcher stores and call the new stores "stretchmarks"

 

 

                         ken anderson        

[ken anderson.]

even worse-flasher in the local park exposed himself to three old ladies!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

two had a stroke---------------but the third couldn't reach

 

 

                    it's the way you tell em ken anderson.

[001]

Another Japanese Bank has gone into administration. The Origami Bank has folded.

[Doug Ireland]

[ken anderson.]

latest--bonsai bank are now talking about removing some branches----ouch.

 

                ken anderson.

[Phil Winks]

Oh dear oh dear this is getting painfull Ken

 Keep it up though

[ken anderson.]

hello phil--you've got to have a laugh--what about ken dodds---"what a good day for shoving a cucumber through your neighbours letterbox and shouting - run the aliens have landed"

 

  ken anderson.

[Phil Claridge]

pedigree chum has been bailed out by barkleys

[Former Member]

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[Phil Claridge]

with the blessing of st bernard(groan)

[ken anderson.]

what about the irishman on mastermind--magnus ask's him to name three fruit?

 

"two apples and a pear" he replies

 

 

                                       ken anderson.

[Myron Beaumont]

An old chat up line of mine ( years ago ) was to introduce myself as a mind reader.

It goes something like this ----

" Think of a number between one and ten "

Whatever the reply  I said-

"You've lost - Take your clothes off ! "

It didn't literally work ever but it broke the ice so to speak

[ken anderson.]

i'll try that one on the lad's at the field

[flytilbroke]

OOOhhwww, painful

[ken anderson.]

hands up--be honest -who thinks that the modern comic's are crepe?(not all)------ compared to the likes of cooper,doddy,emery etc,etc --

 

                                               ken anderson.

[Former Member]

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[Myron Beaumont]

 Latest casualty  !!!
The local company making parachutes has had to be baled out

[ken anderson.]

submarine makers have gone under-----------------here here- long live arthur haynes and his sidekick dermont kelly(the irishman)---look on u-tube you'll see some excellant old clip's of old comics--gone but not fogotten.

 

                                               ken anderson.

[Phil Claridge]

goodyear retyred from f1, avon suffering from inflation. how about the late great dave allen

[ken anderson.]

what about poor old benny hill who's show was taken off the airways for not being pc!--look what some get away with now.

 

                                 ken anderson.

[ken anderson.]

what about the old modeller who went to the doc's and enquired.....

 

"i don't drink,smoke.swear or have anything to do with women!!!.................will i live to be 100?"

 

 no replies the doc............ but it will seem that long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!......

 

      ken anderson.

[Former Member]

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[Myron Beaumont]

Stood waiting for a train in Redruth station I struck up a conversation with an old chap

Where are you going ?-I asked

Oh I'm not going anywhere I'm waiting for my brother to arrive from Australia who I 'avn't seen for 30 years

He must have changed then how will you recognise him-I said

Oh  He'll recognise ME 'cos I havn't been anywhere

[ken anderson.]

things are getting bad---

 

the police have just identified the fully clothed body found hidden in the partition wall of a house under renovation in surrey.............

 

a police spokesman informed the public he had been identified as the 1956 irish world hide and seek champion!!

 

                                  ken anderson.

[Former Member]

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