Sign of the times - funnies * Remember this is a family friendly forum and inappropriate postings will be removed without warning.

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

[Christopher Wolfe]

[extra slim]

Mornin all, apologies, a little late joining as I needed to run a few errands before work but couldn't find my shoes, in the end I just wrapped my feet in bubble wrap and just popped to the shops

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

[Shaun Walsh]

33 minutes ago, Brian Cooper said:

Not sure my Building Surveyor daughter would appreciate that one! ☹️

[Shaun Walsh]

On 04/10/2023 at 08:39, Christopher Wolfe said:

Guaranteed to bring you to a sticky end.

[Paul De Tourtoulon]

[Brian Cooper]

[Eric Robson]

On 04/10/2023 at 13:56, Brian Cooper said:

Give it to your wife,  no nagging for a week. 

[extra slim]

Morning, last night my dog swallowed a whole bag of scrabble tiles, I called the vet this morning to see how he is, but no word yet

[Shaun Walsh]

50 minutes ago, extra slim said:

Morning, last night my dog swallowed a whole bag of scrabble tiles, I called the vet this morning to see how he is, but no word yet

I know that vet, Carol Vorderman works there and she's keeping an eye on your dog. "Vowel, consonant, consonant, consonant, vowel, consonant, vowel, consonant, consonant". She's worked out that he's "IMPROVING".

[Brian Cooper]

6 hours ago, Eric Robson said:

Give it to your wife,  no nagging for a week. 

Nahhh, she went years ago.

 

That reminds me.... I must brush the leaves off the patio. 😉 

[Eric Robson]

1 hour ago, Brian Cooper said:

Nahhh, she went years ago.

 

That reminds me.... I must brush the leaves off the patio. 😉 

Sounds like the situation is grave 

[kevin b]

3 hours ago, Eric Robson said:

Sounds like the situation is grave 

Was that a subtle "dig" Eric ?

🤣

[Martin Harris - Moderator]

There could be grave consequences. 
 

Edit:  Sorry Eric, I missed your post!

Edited October 6, 2023 by Martin Harris - Moderator

[Brian Cooper]

An engineer, a mathematician and an accountant go to a work interview. 

First up is the engineer. The employer asks him, "What is 2+2?"
The engineer, a little confused, answers, "4 of course."
The employer thanks him and calls in the mathematician.

Again, he asks, "What is 2+2?"
The mathematician states, "With high certainty, it’s around 4."
The employer thanks him and calls in the accountant.

 

Again, he asks, "What is2+2?"
The accountant looks around, stands up and closes the curtains before he bends down and whispers: "What do you want it to be?"

 

[cymaz]

5 hours ago, Brian Cooper said:

An engineer, a mathematician and an accountant go to a work interview. 

First up is the engineer. The employer asks him, "What is 2+2?"
The engineer, a little confused, answers, "4 of course."
The employer thanks him and calls in the mathematician.

Again, he asks, "What is 2+2?"
The mathematician states, "With high certainty, it’s around 4."
The employer thanks him and calls in the accountant.

 

Again, he asks, "What is2+2?"
The accountant looks around, stands up and closes the curtains before he bends down and whispers: "What do you want it to be?"

 

 

Its that sort of accounting that’s landed trump in court at the moment 🤣

[ken anderson.]

grandad came back from the war with one leg.................to this day we never found out who it belonged to !! 

 

ken anderson...ne..1....war dept.

[Brian Cooper]

[Shaun Walsh]

2 hours ago, ken anderson. said:

grandad came back from the war with one leg.................to this day we never found out who it belonged to !! 

 

ken anderson...ne..1....war dept.

Was his name Jake or Rolf?

[Christopher Wolfe]

On 05/10/2023 at 20:14, Paul De Tourtoulon said:

 

Reminds me of many years ago when I saw an envelope marked 'Photographs -Do Not Bend'

 

So I rolled it up and wrote on the envelope ' Yes They Do!'

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]