cymaz Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 🤣🤣🍻🍻🤣🤣 Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realise you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.' The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defence attorney?' She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.' The defence attorney nearly died. The judge asked both counsellors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair. 3 3 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 4 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EvilC57 Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 1 hour ago, Brian Cooper said: Social distancing..? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
extra slim Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 As I age, I remember all the people I've lost along the way. I think to myself, " A career as a tour guide wasn't for me!!!" 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
extra slim Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 Was a little late coming on this morning as i'm thinking of moving house and went to look at a property, I fancy moving into a lighthouse........but don't want anything too flashy 1 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zflyer Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 How illuminating Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john stones 1 - Moderator Posted February 10, 2023 Share Posted February 10, 2023 Was going to say "marriage on the rocks" ? best not eh. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Fry Posted February 11, 2023 Share Posted February 11, 2023 Today, Daily Mail. 2 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 11, 2023 Share Posted February 11, 2023 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 11, 2023 Share Posted February 11, 2023 I've recently discovered I can smell a coconut from a mile away. It's going to come in handy with my new job as a Bounty hunter! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 12, 2023 Share Posted February 12, 2023 2 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cymaz Posted February 12, 2023 Share Posted February 12, 2023 5 1 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cymaz Posted February 13, 2023 Share Posted February 13, 2023 On 11/02/2023 at 07:02, Don Fry said: Today, Daily Mail. Entrance to Penmount Crematorium, just NW Truro Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 13, 2023 Share Posted February 13, 2023 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaun Walsh Posted February 13, 2023 Share Posted February 13, 2023 My wife complains that I don't treat her properly any more. I explained that you can't get creosote these days. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 13, 2023 Share Posted February 13, 2023 2 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
extra slim Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 a little late on this morning as I had an early appointment with my psychiatrist about my fear of lifts and escalators...................fortunately I can take steps to avoid them 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 14, 2023 Share Posted February 14, 2023 Apparently I don’t pay my wife enough attention. She complained I never buy her flowers on Valentine’s Day. To be honest, I didn’t know she sold them. 2 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brian Cooper Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 1 1 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EvilC57 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 AA3B775E-874D-4FD8-A87E-8FDA961B6455.MOV 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Berriman Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 I am unable to open your file even when logged in 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
john davidson 1 Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 Nor me 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul De Tourtoulon Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 It's ok for me,, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paul De Tourtoulon Posted February 15, 2023 Share Posted February 15, 2023 4 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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