Sign of the times - funnies * Remember this is a family friendly forum and inappropriate postings will be removed without warning.

[cymaz]

40 minutes ago, Eric Robson said:

Electric.

AA batteries 🔋 

[Andy J]

28 minutes ago, cymaz said:

AA batteries 🔋 

NO batteries enclosed in this product.  Batteries may be purchased separately from our After Sales Service Dept.

 

Please note: Our After Sales Service will be closed over the Christmas period and will re-open in 2024 or perhaps 2025.

[Shaun Walsh]

2 hours ago, Brian Cooper said:

Definitely a diesel wife, they're dirtier and they've got more bottom end power!

[Gavin Mack]

[cymaz]

 

 

 

 

 

 

Talking of trombones...that reminds me 

 

 

 

 

[Brian Cooper]

[Christopher Wolfe]

[Zflyer]

The Umbrella I think is for protection from Jeremy Clarkson!!

 

 

 

 

[Chris Walby]

6 hours ago, Christopher Wolfe said:

 

Simple, you just use a very very sharp knife and hack away at the packaging, 🤣

[cymaz]

Why can’t I open child proof lids?

[Martin Harris - Moderator]

Get a 4 year old to show you...

[Jake Bullit]

This guy is genius and funny:

 

 

[Brian Cooper]

As seen in some of the better restaurants... 

 

[Peter Christy]

14 hours ago, Martin Harris - Moderator said:

Get a 4 year old to show you...

Yes, I remember buying a video recorder "so simple a 4-year old can work it". The trouble is, you can never find a four-year old when you need one...!

[Wingman]

Wife sent me a text yesterday saying she was in Casualty.
When I got home last night I watched all 50 minutes of it - never saw her once
She still hasn’t come home yet and I’m starving!!!!!

[cymaz]

1 hour ago, Peter Christy said:

Yes, I remember buying a video recorder "so simple a 4-year old can work it". The trouble is, you can never find a four-year old when you need one...!

I bet gary glitter could

[Brian Cooper]

[Christopher Wolfe]

Well, it's that time of the year, so here goes;

 

 Have a safe and merry Christmas

 

Chris

[PatMc]

Cinderella takes her phone into Boots the chemist, uploads some photos then selects the next day print service. As she's leaving her fairy godmother walks in.

"Is something the matter, Cinders?" FG asks. 

"Oh no" says Cinders "In one day my prints will come" 

[Eric Robson]

Sorry Pat that was Snow White,

[PatMc]

Snow White didn't have a Fairy Godmother but as Cinderella was too poor to have her own prince so she dreamed up an imaginary one.

Lo & behold FG made her dream come true !

Moral is - if you don't have a dream, how are you going to make a dream come true.

Edited December 22, 2022 by PatMc

[Brian Cooper]

[Eric Robson]

11 hours ago, PatMc said:

Snow White didn't have a Fairy Godmother but as Cinderella was too poor to have her own prince so she dreamed up an imaginary one.

Lo & behold FG made her dream come true !

Moral is - if you don't have a dream, how are you going to make a dream come true.

Oh well Hi Ho!

[cymaz]

[cymaz]

For the Festive Season...

 

Scrooge got up and open the window. London shone as the new day began. It was crisp and white all over the rooftops. He looked down at the snow covered  street below and saw a small boy.

”Hey you, boy , what day is it?”. The lad looked up and said, “ It’s the first day of the DFS sofa sale, sir”