Sign of the times - funnies * Remember this is a family friendly forum and inappropriate postings will be removed without warning.

[Shaun Walsh]

1 hour ago, Geoff S said:

 

Of course, you have to remember that 'Hank Jansen' was, in reality British writer Stephen Daniel Francis and not a hard bitten Chicago crime reporter.  I just looked up Jansen on Amazon Kindle and they're all still available for about £2 each.  Apparently he could write a novel in a couple of weeks (faster than Barbara Cartland!) and used a Dictaphone back in 1949.  Amazing!

I've never used my dictaphone, I use my fingers instead.

[Brian Cooper]

A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says, "Six Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident."

The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing, "That's horrible!."

 

Confused, he replies, "Yes Dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved."

 

After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, "How many is a Brazilian?"

[EvilC57]

13 hours ago, Brian Cooper said:

Reminds me of this…!

 

 

Edited May 12 by EvilC57

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

[cymaz]

34 minutes ago, Brian Cooper said:

Mary has a little lamb 

she tied it to a pylon

10,000 volts went in its fleece

and turned its wool to nylon

[Andy Stephenson]

1 hour ago, Brian Cooper said:

Yes but do androids dream of them?

[EvilC57]

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

[Brian Cooper]

Learning about electricity. . . 

 

 

 

[Brian Cooper]

I am fed up with comments from people ridiculing Electric Vehicles.  They don't know what they're talking about.
Personally, I drive two top of the range EVs, a Jaguar and a Porsche.

Their acceleration and handling is fantastic. They look brilliant and they're really cheap to run. They need hardly any maintenance and haven't depreciated since I bought them.

 

Literally, the only criticism I could make of them is sometimes, if I really push them hard into a corner, they can fly off the track and get stuck under the sofa...

 

[J D 8 - Moderator]

Yes that's the way electric fence works and the one at the end of the line will have the strongest shock even if the others had been standing on the ground.

Have accidentally tested my farm fence many times and even with wellies on you get a good belt.

    Goats testing electric fence on Clarkson's Farm, funniest thing, more so as they seem to say  oww every time.

[Andy Stephenson]

5 hours ago, Brian Cooper said:

 

[Peter Miller]

32 minutes ago, Andy Stephenson said:

 

Now there is a patient dog!!

[Eric Robson]

The dog was beamed up when the Enterprise was visiting a planet of giants 

Edited May 14 by Eric Robson

[Chris Freeman 3]

[Andy Stephenson]

1 hour ago, Eric Robson said:

The dog was beamed up when the Enterprise was visiting a planet of giants 

I can't help thinking the Enterprise would have benefitted from some down-thrust!

[Paul De Tourtoulon]

2 hours ago, J D 8 said:

Yes that's the way electric fence works and the one at the end of the line will have the strongest shock even if the others had been standing on the ground.

Have accidentally tested my farm fence many times and even with wellies on you get a good belt.

    Goats testing electric fence on Clarkson's Farm, funniest thing, more so as they seem to say  oww every time.

We have wild boar here, my wife kindly tested the electric fence in her garden boots, and yes it does work on humans.😂

[Geoff S]

5 hours ago, Brian Cooper said:

Learning about electricity. . . 

 

 

 

 

My cousin and I used to touch electric fences quite often at his dad's farm when we were kids. It wasn't that big a deal.  In fact when I was teenager I used to get regular 7kv shocks when I was testing supposedly faulty TV line output transformers which were returned for replacement/repair (they had replaceable valve diodes (U25) which were used to generate high voltages for CRT anodes)

Edited May 14 by Geoff S

[john davidson 1]

3 hours ago, J D 8 said:

Yes that's the way electric fence works and the one at the end of the line will have the strongest shock even if the others had been standing on the ground.

Have accidentally tested my farm fence many times and even with wellies on you get a good belt.

    Goats testing electric fence on Clarkson's Farm, funniest thing, more so as they seem to say  oww every time.

Farm where I used to shoot had all electric fences powered on the mains, gave a shock many times worse than battery power. I got belted twice and it REALLY hurt. Any dog affected was useless for the rest of the day.

[kevin b]

[kevin b]